Today we received the results of Joel's scan and those results were CLEAR praise God! That means that Joel now has a year and a half of remission under his belt-wow. These scans are always so difficult in a way that I could never describe. It is a restless time from the day of the test until we get the results 2 days later. Last night I didn't sleep well and all day at work I fought this knot in the pit of my stomach. You pray for the best-hope for and believe for the best-but everything else is out of your control-and cancer makes that reality very clear to you. It is not so much the fear of a disease returning because you can fight that. It is the reality of how much your life will change if that happens and basically the pure hell that you will have to go through once again. That is what I think I fear more than the disease itself. Beyond that we just know that every day that we are living a day that is outside of the world of cancer is something never to be taken for granted.
This is a picture that I snapped of Joel waiting in the room waiting for the doctor to come in with our results. I thought it was so interesting, Joel in his work attire, a symbol of his strength and how hard he fought to get back to a normal life. And yet still no matter how far he progresses we still have to have these appointments where the fear is that everything will change again in an instant. It is a picture of the 2 worlds that we always feel ourselves caught between and will for quite awhile. It is our reality and we accept it.
Today we received the sad news that our Oncology doctor is going to be moving out of state and will no longer be our doctor. We were both really bummed out by this news. When you go through an ordeal like cancer you become very close to your doctor's and nursing staff. This doctor's temperament was a perfect fit for us. He was calm, positive, and always so patient with me in my neurotic moments. He would answer my questions a thousand times over without the slightest hint of annoyance and he always met us with a smile and a positive outlook for Joel's future. I know that moving on is a part of life but we will really miss him and forever be grateful for his part in our life journey. We will be staying at OU Medical center because we LOVE them there and will be meeting our new doctor at our next appointment.
Joel's next CT scan will be in 4 months. They let us have an extra month off since Joel was doing so well which made us very happy. Getting to write posts with great news never gets old. We are so incredibly blessed. To God be the glory for His continued work in our lives!