A Good Friday

Joel got through this week of chemo. One more  X to mark off of our chemo countdown list that we keep on our fridge. Now only 3 left to go! He was very sick the entire time with his normal symptoms but for now they have the nausea managed as best they can. It doesn't mean that is is non-existent because it is definitely there-but he is able to keep his food down.

I had told you before that our MD Anderson doctor has told us during the last 2 trips that he would give Joel his blessing if Joel wanted to quit chemo at this point. He is aware of how difficult these last few cycles have been on him and his body. He knows we are at the end of our rope in ever way possible. But he also told us that the longer we go the better the chance that any lingering cancer will be killed. Last time we were there Joel had told him that he absolutely wanted to keep going. His resolve faltered a little at the start of this week and he said he was ready to stop after this cycle. We went back and forth this entire week on what to do. We had a meeting with our doctor here at OU yesterday and I asked about the statistical importance of finishing out the chemo. He told us that there is nothing that tells us statistically what a difference the last 3 treatments will make but it is just best to do everything that you can humanly do so when it's done you can say that I gave it my very all. Then you leave the rest in God's hands. That made us just realize that that's what we need to do. We need to finish it out. It doesn't matter that it is getting more and more difficult we have to finish and finish this strong.

On this Easter weekend I think even more on death and resurrection. I think about how in our own lives many times we feel at the end and we feel like we are constantly dying over and over again. We have felt that way many times this last year. But what we celebrate this weekend isn't the power of the grave but the power of his resurrection. That when things seem over that He can bring life again to even the darkest of circumstances. Our prayer is that it will be so in our life. That all of the things that we have felt have died in our life and lost in our life that He will resurrect those things again. And that they will be in an even more glorious form of what they were before. That is the amazing power of our God. Let it be so for us-let it be so for you.